Social Etiquette

I thought you all might find this interesting.  It's just a few cultural guidelines that were included in our host family and volunteer guide.

Behaviors to Avoid:

1.      Smelling/sniffing food: Smelling your food indicates that the food is bad and reflects badly on the cook and their cooking methods.  You should therefore avoid sniffing your food so as to not imply that it is rotten or smells bad. 

2.       Use of the index finger: In Rwanda, the index finger is used to call dogs.  Dogs are not valued here and Rwandans do not like to be associated with them because they are considered to be dirty.  Calling someone over by use of the index finger is like calling them a dog.

Also, using the index finger to call someone over communicates an arrogant or superior attitude as the colonialists used to call the natives by using the index finger.  To call someone over, wave the palm of the hand in a downward motion.

3.   Public displays of affection: Love is highly valued here, however it is related to sex and is considered to be very private and should not be displayed in public.  Kissing and hugging in public is not common.  Even holding hands between two people of the opposite sex in public is considered improper. (Holding hands between two people of the same sex is okay as it is signifies close friendship).

4.   Hanging underwear outside (to dry): Underpants are private clothing and to hang them where people can see them is to expose yourself as naked.  When drying underpants outside, they should be covered with a cloth.  Ideally, they should be dried in your room and then ironed to kill any microbes that would have otherwise been killed by the sun.

5.   Handing things to others with your left hand: You are not to hand anyone anything with the left hand.  Always use the right or both (the left hand on the right one) as a sign of respect.

6.   Dogs: you are not to let a dog lick you as it is considered unclean.  Rwandans are not fond of dogs at all.  After the genocide, starving dogs would walk around and eat the dead bodies of their owners, hence the reason they are not valued here as they are in America.

7.   Wearing torn/dirty clothes or immodest dress: Clothes and shoes must always be clean and mended.  Women should avoid clothing that is tight, transparent, low-cut, or too short.  Bleached or ripped jeans are not appropriate.

Behaviors to Adopt:

1.      Greeting people: Politeness in America is pegged by saying please and thank you.  However, politeness in Rwanda is communicated through the use of greetings.  Greeting is one of the most important cultural practices and foreigners should be aware of this as it can either enhance or distort good relationships.  If someone greets you, it means he/she respects you and is ready to begin a conversation at any time.  If you need any help from someone, it is very important to greet them first or else they may not want to help you.  If you don't greet your neighbors every time you see them, it means you are not on good terms with them.  Not greeting someone is to deny them their existence.

2.      Respecting elders: Rwandans are very age conscious and offer the upmost respect to their elders.  They are respected for the wisdom they have and for the fact that in traditional Rwandan society, it was believed that elders had the power to curse any person who is disrespectful.  For this reason, Rwandans try hard not to annoy their elders and tend to give them priority in daily situations (ie. giving them their seats in public transportation, greeting them, removing hats when talking to them, seeing that they are served food first, etc.).

Fast Facts

·         Africans typically eat with their hands, to be more precise, their right hand.

·         In some families, males eat separate from females, or children separate from adults

·         Rwandans have a very strong extended family system.  If one has a good job, there will be a big flow of relatives coming to seek help; and the relative must help because oftentimes, they were helped by their family to get where they are today.

·         Rwandans like to help one another--one's problem is another's.  It is culturally expected that those who are working and have stable families take in needy relatives and friends. 

·         The more prosperous someone is, the more relatives they are expected to take in or assist financially

·         Almost every Rwandan family houses at least one orphan

·         Division of labor is organized by gender.  Female work roles consist of housework (fetching water, gathering fuel, meal preparation, child rearing, washing clothes, washing dishes, cleaning the house, and gardening activities).  Male work roles consist of maintaining the house and taking care of livestock.  Men often have more leisure time than women.

·         When waving hello to someone, you must use the queen-style wave.  Waving with the fingers moving up and down beckons someone to 'come here'

*Taken from the Peace Corps Rwanda Homestay Manual*

Love and Peace Corps,

Dametreea




(Written 6/9/12, 1:15p)