2 A.M. Blues

I woke up about 20 minutes ago with the worse pain in my stomach.  At 2:13 in the morning I'm lying here wiggling my legs beneath the sheets and rubbing my tummy in hope of stopping the pain; I think to myself...noooo, not at 2am!! Please wait until the morning...It's pitch black outside!!!

The PC doctors warned us that it happens to every volunteer--many times-- but I've been lucky enough to escape it for 4 long months, and believe me, it has been great.  Until today.  Yesterday I made some cabbage and questionable carrots (the carrots weren't in the best shape, but I hate to waste food) so I cooked them anyway; and I had my usual tea, but I ran out of Nido, so I was trying a new (less expensive) powdered milk.  My tummy has been acting funky all day today, but ohemgee why did it have to hit me so hard so late in the night (or early in the morning).  Either way, there are several possibilities for culprits.  It could be the fact that all I ate today was toast and tea (with the new powdered milk) for breakfast, Twix and Butterfinger for lunch, and Cheese-Its and Skittles for dinner.  And then again, it could be the cabbage and "bad" carrots that I ate last night.  Whatever it was, it had me up at 2 o clock in the morning, attempting to devise a plan to go outside to my latrine in the pitch-blackness and do so without some crazy person jumping from behind a bush or banana tree to take me out to the far-reaches of Rwanda and leaving me there.

I thought about waiting until morning, but since the pain in my tummy was only getting worse and daylight was too far away to wait, I hopped out of the bed, unlocked and opened my room door, and stopped for a second to think about what I could take outside with me to protect myself in case someone was out there.  (I don't know why it hadn't occurred to me that these people would have better things to do with their early morning than sit outside my house waiting for me to come out with a serious case of Mr. D, but it's better to be safe than sorry right)?  At any rate, I decided that mace (hopefully it's not expired) was the best thing to take with me...if anything happened, I could simply spray and run (and scream bloody murder).  Next  up, I unlocked my back door and grabbed all of the things that I considered essential for this short trip through my back yard and to the latrine: my mace, my keys for the latrine, my headlamp, my cell phone (just in case), and what we call Papier Hygenique (I'm not too sure about that spelling, but you get the idea).

When I finally gathered all of the "tools" that I might have needed, I slowly (but loudly) opened my back door.  (Of course it would have been too much for it to open quietly so that the whole friggin village didn't know that I was going outside at 2am)!  Next, I stuck only my head out so that I could take a peek outside to make sure the coast was clear.  It was.  So I stepped out and tiptoed my way across my yard, doing my best to not make a sound.  I kind of felt like my own intruder with how quiet and careful I was trying to be, but I was scared out of my mind and praying non-stop that no strange person (or creature for that matter) would try to get me.

In the end, the entire charade went without a hitch...that is, until I got back to the safety of my house, locked my door, got comfortable in my bed, and that familiar stomach pain returned full on.  Here we go again, I thought to myself.  I got up (reluctantly) said another prayer for safety, and repeated all of the steps listed out above (give or take a few).

 I'm definitely calling in to work tomorrow...no way I'll make it to the 7am meeting at this rate.

Love and Peace Corps,

Dametreea

P.S. My apologies for the gross post...there won't be too many more like it.  I just had to express how friggin' scared I was going out to the latrine at TWO AM when it was PITCH BLACK outside!

P.S.S. I promise I'm not starving myself out here.  From the looks of today's lunch and dinner you probably think otherwise, but I have a really good explanation.  When I got home from church today, I wasn't all that hungry so I just decided to snack on a Twix and Butterfinger while I watched a movie.  And then when dinner time rolled around, I attempted to reheat my cabbage and carrots; but just when the pot began to heat up on my little electric stove, the electricity went out...and didn't turn back on :(  ...So...I looked through my pantry and decided that Cheese-Its (and Skittles for dessert) were the perfect substitute to the leftover cabbage and carrots that shouldn't have been eaten anyway (they had been out all night last night and all day today).  The more I think about it, the more I think the Lord made my electricity go out so I wouldn't reheat and eat (possibly) spoiled food--though when I smelled the cabbage and carrots, they smelled almost normal...I guess almost wasn't good enough.  Either way, I still got sick :-/