I went to visit my neighbor (who is the sweetest woman ever) on Wednesday and she asked me to come to church with her on Friday. I told her, "I'm Christian." Then she said, "That's okay, it's just to visit." I asked her when and where the church was and she told me that she goes on Fridays. "I work on Fridays," I told her and then she said, "We can go during your lunch." Great, I'm cornered. I have the hardest time telling people no, so I obliged and told her that I would come to her house as soon as I got off of work for lunch. I'm strong in my faith as a Christian so I figured it wouldn't be too big of a problem; also, I'm not perfectly fluent in Kinyarwanda just yet so I probably wouldn't have been able to understand what was being said anyway. I agreed to go more for integration purposes than to be converted to Muslim and I assumed this wouldn't be a problem...that is...until I asked two of my coworkers for their advice.
After the staff
meeting on Thursday morning, I walked into the office that I share with two of
my coworkers and popped my big question.
"My neighbor asked me to go to church with her on Friday, but she's
Muslim. I'm not sure if it's appropriate
for me to go or not. What do you
think?" Little did I know, I opened
up a huge can of worms with this question and should have stuck with just
asking my mom and sister in America for their opinions. One of my (very outspoken) coworkers, who
happens to speak English rather well, lit into me immediately. Here is a blurb of what he said: "Why
would you want to go to church with them?
Muslims are dirty! Do not be their friends! Do not go to their mosque! Do not eat the food they give you! They are different. They do not have hygiene. When they use the bathroom, they wipe with
their right hand and will make you sick."
As he said all of this, I couldn't help but to notice
how emotional he
suddenly got. I mean, the guy was practically yelling at me. In between his extremely rude, ignorant, and
disrespectful statements, I did my best to respond in defense of my neighbor,
but his booming voice kept over powering mine and I've never been much of an arguer. He continued, "You cannot go with
her. Even in America you are afraid of
Muslims." Then I interrupted,
"No, in America we are not afraid of Muslims." "But you are afraid of Al Quida,"
he said. I responded, "Yes, we are
afraid of terrorists, but not all Muslims are terrorists." At this point he threw up his hands, turned
away from me, and said, "Fine then.
Go to church with the terrorists.
You will be killed." And
then the conversation stopped. I decided
that arguing with him wouldn't change his mind so I called it quits.
Just when I
thought I was in the clear of that conversation, my coworker started up again! This time in a much calmer voice, he said, "Do not go with her. I know you are thirsty to know Kinyarwanda
and culture, but to go to a Muslim church in Rwanda is bad. If you keep going to so many different
churches the people will think you are a spy.
It is okay to talk with her, but do not go to church with
her." And with that, I decided not
to go. Not for the fact that he told me
not to or because she would "kill" me, but because I don't want my
going to a Muslim mosque to hinder my integration. Apparently mixing religions by any means is
unacceptable in Rwanda...even if you are just going to visit. Lucky for me, though, I didn't have to tell
her I changed my mind because something came up and I had to go to Kigali on
Thursday night. Lets cross our fingers
and hope she doesn't ask me again. I so
suck at saying no.
Love and Peace Corps,
Dametreea
Hi Dametreea, i have just found your blog, i am on business (now pleasure, cos that is done) in Kigali , and am loving the experience. i had NO CLUE how amazing Rwanda was and am pleasantly surprised!
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work :)
Thank you!! This is such an amazing country! Sounds like you're having just a good a time as I am!!
DeleteI agree with the yelling young man. I don't know why he reacted the way he did. Maybe there is a reason behind it. Maybe that's not where the Lord wanted you to be. Satan will try to entice you through others to do something that you should not venture into. It doesn't matter if you are strong or not. Remember after Jesus 40 day fast and satan took him to the highest point and tempted him. Well your situation is somewhat the same. Some things you have to rebuke in your head and just say thank you but no thanks I like to worship at the place I am attending. Also remember that God put people in place to protect you. Don't let frustration or anger keep you from seeing the message God may have for you through them. I am glad you decided not to go for whatever reason. I love you and miss you more than you know. Mommy
ReplyDeleteHi my name is Denise, I know your mom and she told me about your amazing adventure. When I was 14 missionaries from Africa came to our church and told us about the works they were doing there and all the people who were getting saved.They were taking teenagers back with them to help build a church,I really wanted to with them but my mom would not let me go. What a blessing for you that you are there. I also have a very hard time saying no and it has gotten me into some problems. I believe that God closes the doors he does not want us to go through, and it looks like he might be closing that one. I will be praying for you to be strong when you need to say no to something. God Bless you and all of the others that are helping there. Denise
ReplyDeleteHi my name is Denise, I am a friend of your moms. I think it is amazing what you are doing. When I was 14 I wanted to go to
ReplyDeleteAfrica with the missionaries from our church that lived in Africa. We were going to build a church, but my mom would not let me go. I am so glad you were able to go. It sounds amazing. I also have a very hard time saying no, it has gotten me in some uncomfortable situations. I am still learning its okay to say no. I believe that God will close the doors that He does not want us to go through and open the doors He does want us to go through. It sounds to me like He closed that door. I will be praying for you to have the strength to say no when you need to. God Bless and Peace be with you. Denise
Hi Denise,
DeleteI also believe that God closes some doors to open up others. Thank you for your prayers and for keeping up with my blog!! As for the saying no thing...I'm slowly getting better...slowly... lol